it's been a long day
by Firaga Productions
Summary: Sirius Black comes to terms with growing up. (The Marauders made a pact once. "Like a blood pact?" "Shut up, Sirius.)


**it's been a long day**  
firaga productions

Sirius Black comes to terms with growing up. (Once, the Marauders made a pact. "Like a blood pact?" "Shut up, Padfoot.")

_(_characters belong to queen rowling; song belongs to matchbox 20_)_

* * *

_I'm sorry 'bout the attitude I need to give when I'm with you, but __no one else__ can take this __**shit**__ from me._

* * *

Once, when the Marauders were all 16 for that brief 2 months before Pete's 17th birthday and after Moony's 16th, they made a pact.

"What, like a blood pact?"  
"Shut up, Padfoot."

They piled all onto James' bed, because James had the bed closest to the window, drew the curtains, had a few bottles of firewhiskey they'd knicked from The Three Broomsticks Hogsmeade trip before last, and they were all good and tipsy when James made the suggestion.

"You're all stupid. It's about to be our last year at Hogwarts, and I just think it's time we made a pact, is all."  
"A pack of what?"  
"A _pact_, Wormtail, Merlin's beard, do you ever read?"

The pact was simply this: we solemnly swear that we shall never part. When they graduated Hogwarts, began working, moved off to London or Dublin or Merlin knows where, got married, had kids or (they jabbed at Remus jokingly) none at all, that they would meet together as frequently as they could, that they would be friends long into their old age.

* * *

Of course, these sorts of pacts are often broken, rarely sustained.

* * *

In the middle of Seventh Year, Lily Evans marched across the Great Hall to one James Potter after a particularly _loud_ bickering match between the two, and promptly kissed him right on the lips. James turned a brilliant shade of puce, and the entirety of Gryffindor house erupted into cheers.

Sirius solemnly swears that he saw Dumbledore slip McGonagall some coins at the staff table.

* * *

"But James, I thought we were going to get a flat!"  
"Padfoot, you _know_ Lily's mum just died. I can't.. I can't leave her like this."  
"But you fucking promised, you _solemnly swore-"_  
"_We're not kids anymore, Sirius, Merlin!_"  
"Bugger off, this isn't about being kids. I thought we were best mates!"  
"We still are Sirius, but, I mean... she's got nobody now, nobody but me.."

* * *

"Pete's been gone a lot lately, d'you notice?"

Remus answers with a grunt, as it's early in the morning and he hasn't finished his coffee.

"I mean, James isn't around as much, what with the Order and with Lily, but now Wormtail's been gone a while, too."

Another grunt. A sip of coffee. A heavy sigh from Sirius.

"I guess, I dunno. I guess I'm just worried about him. I know his dad's got him working loads. But he didn't used to be gone this much, when we first left school. You know?"

* * *

Remus enters the living room to see Sirius curled up under a blanket by a roaring fire reading a newspaper intently. He knows immediately that something's wrong, something's terribly wrong. So he treads carefully towards Sirius, curls into his side under the blanket, and reads.

_Known Death Eater and heir to the Black fortune Regulus A. Black, found dead this morning. Cause of death: unknown._

"Sirius," Remus breathes, wrapping an arm around him. "I-I'm so sorry. Are you alright?"

"Fine, just fucking fine," Sirius snaps back, pushing Remus away and crumpling the newspaper in his hand. Remus flinches at the aggressive actions, and Sirius throws the paper into the fire with a sneer that could match one Severus Snape. "S'not like he was family anyway," he seeths before stomping off into his bedroom with a loud slam of the door.

It's 2 AM, 4 hours later, when Remus creeps quietly out of bed and into the kitchen for a cup of water. Glancing to the living room, he sees Sirius wrapped up in that same blanket, sitting on the floor with his back against the couch, staring blankly at the pile of ashes in the fireplace. Without even thinking about it, Remus is on the floor, Sirius is in his arms, weeping helplessly into his shoulder. He wraps one arm around his neck and the other reaches to gingerly touch his head, still at first, but he runs his fingers through Sirius' hair and gently scratches the back of his neck and behind his ears, and Sirius cries.

Sirius wakes up first the next morning, cheeks stained from tears, still being held by his best friend. He wriggles closer, rests his head against his chest, and lets himself drift back to sleep.

* * *

_Can you believe it, Padfoot? Lily's pregnant. Pregnant! I'm gonna be a father, Padfoot!_

"They're fucking _mental_, Moony! Mental!"  
"Sirius."  
"I mean, what are they fucking THINKING, bringing a baby into a world like this!"  
"Sirius."  
"We're in the middle of a _great sodding war_, it's not _safe_, it's not _right!_"  
"Sirius."  
"What? What is it, Remus? What the _fuck_ sort of defense do you have for this bloody _nonsense_ they've got planned!"  
"They've not forgotten about you, Sirius. You haven't lost him."

Sirius wants to punch him, now more than ever, because _as per usual_ Remus Lupin has hit exactly the core of the problem, known exactly what was wrong with him before he could even be bothered to figure it out for himself. And he's pissed. Perfect, selfless, all knowing Remus Lupin knows everything that Sirius has ever felt, and it's bloody annoying! He wants to punch him in the jaw, get into a proper fight with him, knock him to the ground and kick him in the shin.

Instead, he sighs heavily, and looks up at Remus sadly. "How can you be so sure, mate?"

At this, Remus smiles widely. "Read the postscript, Padfoot. You're going to be a godfather."

* * *

Sirius is the only one who stays with Moony through the transformations anymore. James has his hands full with a pregnant Lily, and Wormtail's always busy these days. So, just the two of them, they apparate to a forest in Derbyshire once a month, and Padfoot keeps him in the woods and away from the village every month. Padfoot sits with him in the early mornings as he's transforming back, nuzzles his great, black head into his neck, helps him get to his feet, and apparates him back to their flat once a month. Sirius sits by his bedside, strokes his head gently, learns all the healing spells and potions he can, and makes sure that none of these transformations is the one to finally kill him.

* * *

One morning, a few months before the James' son is born, Sirius wanders into the kitchen yawning wildly, wearing boxers and a white tank top, stretching his arms as high as he can, and smiles at Remus, who is already seated at their table with his second mug of coffee and an old history book. Sirius pours a glass of milk and sits across from Remus, and they sit in a familiar, companionable silence as the sun makes its ascent into the sky that day.

* * *

Remus is the one who makes Sirius breakfast in the mornings and brings it to him in his bed after a particularly grueling mission for the Order. Sometimes, they go on these missions together, but more often than not it's Remus waiting at home for news and Sirius who stumbles in after hours, cuts on his arms, bleeding from his forehead, with a great big grin on his face and a package of Honeyduke's finest chocolate in his hand, limping into the living room and tracking mud all over the house. Remus smiles weakly, takes him by the hand to the bathroom, and helps him clean up the dirt and the blood from his arms. Remus has never been as good at healing spells as Sirius, so instead he takes care to clean him well and lets Sirius perform the spells on himself before he crawls into bed and falls unconscious. Remus sleeps in his bed on these nights, curled up on the other side so as not to touch him or make him uncomfortable, and wakes up early to prepare something to eat, as Sirius is often half-starved after these missions.

* * *

They stop taking the Daily Prophet 6 months after Regulus' death.

* * *

They argue often. It's always silly things, like how Sirius leaves his laundry scattered about the bathroom, how Remus doesn't clean his dishes after cooking, or how neither of them ever remembers to take the trash out. It's normal for them to scream at each other until they're hoarse over the chores that haven't been done that day, but neither is willing to go to bed angry because they're in a war, and they might not wake up the next morning.

* * *

Sirius wakes up one day, wanders into the kitchen to see Remus with his mug of coffee, his book, wearing boxers and a thick, purple jumper, and he is suddenly struck by how absolutely, maddeningly beautiful Remus Lupin is. So he sits down at his usual chair across from Remus and stares intently, before he finally looks up and raises an eyebrow.

"What?" Remus asks. "'ve I got somethin'on my face?"  
"Remus Lupin, you are incredible, did you know?"  
"Er... what? A-are you alright, Padfoot?"  
"I've never been better, Moony my dear!" Sirius grins wildly. "I've only just realised it."  
"Erm, realised what?"

Sirius feels his stomach turning, his heart beating erratically, but Sirius Black has always been impulsive and courageous, and they're in a war zone of course, so he musters up the Gryffindor strength he was sorted for, and grasps Moony's hand across the table.

"We're practically a couple anyway, Moony, have you ever noticed?"

Remus blushes dark pink, and Sirius knows that this feeling, this wonderful, beautiful feeling, is completely mutual.

"So," he says, voice lowered as he stands up and leaps around the table. "Maybe we just..be one. Make it a thing. Yeah?"

And without waiting for an answer, Sirius holds Remus' face by the chin, leans down, and kisses him gently.

* * *

That kiss is the first of countless.

* * *

The Marauders made a pact once, and that pact was broken. James had Lily, Peter had whatever it was he was always busy with, and Sirius had Remus. It took him a long time, but Sirius Black is finally able to come to terms with growing up, especially when he wakes up every morning with an arm around his waist and a warm chest against his back. He becomes quite alright with it when he meets Harry, his perfect godson, and when Harry's first word is "Pa'fo" which Sirius interprets as "Padfoot," of course. He's perfectly okay with the pact being broken on the mornings after the full moon, the nights after grueling missions, the sex on the floor in front of the fireplace, the countless breakfasts and lunches and dinners and midnight snacks, and each time the Marauders manage to get together for drinks.

Perhaps, Sirius thinks as they clink their glasses together on James' living room floor with his pinky entwined with Remus' underneath the coffee table, they haven't quite broken their pact after all.

* * *

Notes: This is kind of shite, but I kind of like it, so whatever. Have some post-war puppies and Marauders and coming of age shit. Sorry I can't write Peter for the life of me so he pretty much barely appears.


End file.
